I could back track and tell you all about the recent months. I could tell you that Caiden's first birthday made me cry and made me feel things I never felt. I could tell you that Peyton turned 6 and started first grade and broke my heart like it has never been broken. I could tell you that Reagan had preschool orientation and I felt sad instead of glad. I could also tell you that my sweet Jordyn is turning 3 in 3 short days and I am NOT taking it so well. I could tell you that my playschool is my dream come true and full of the most amazing children EVER!! I could also tell you that last May 28th my fantastic hubby and I celebrated 7 years of bliss....BUT I wont.;)
Instead I will just type. Type what is in my head. Type what I feel like saying in my "public diary".
I am so blessed. Blessed beyond my wildest dreams. Life is BUSY, FAST and EXHAUSTING for me. But it is what I always prayed for. I have 4 amazing children, a husband that loves me beyond what I deserve, friends that I know truly love me, a job (that although very hard) makes me excited to get up each day and a God that loves me so much more than I know.I am a mom, wife, child of God, playschool teacher, daughter, sister, teacher, team mom and so much more. However, what it comes down to, I am whatever God wants me to be. I never forget that it is God who has blessed me with everything in my life. If you are new to my blog you may not know that I am a God driven, God fearing woman but let me tell you I am!
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength-Philippians 4:13
On to life as it is now. Well, life is amazing! I have 4 sweet angels that light up my life!! Peyton 6 (going on 13) has the deepest brown eyes and a heart of gold! I'm pretty sure that she would give the shirt off her back to keep another warm! Reagan, oh sweet Reagan, my DIVA! A total girl through and through! Lipstick wearing, dancing, and pink all the way! Jordyn, my oh my Jordyn...She is actually what prompt me to post, so I will talk about her next. Then Caiden....I was told that a boy holds a special place in a mama's heart. Boy is it true, Definitely no more, no less than my girls but it is different. I feel like he can pierce me with those eyes and tell me what he feels by looking at me. I feel like he thinks that my hug can make all right in the world. He is needy, but I am ok with that. In fact, I'm not sure what I will do when he doesn't need me.
Then my Jordyn, well, what can I say? DO NOT get me wrong. Of course I do not love her more than my other three beauties BUT every child is different. I am struggling with her turning 3 in three days. In fact, I held her in my arms tonight, stared in those AMAZING BLUE EYES, and started to cry. It seems like just yesterday I sat on my faded old green olive love seat and held a stick in my hand with two lines. I was bawling, at the time not happy tears, because it was Christmas eve and there were TWO unexpected lines on a cheap test instead of ONE that we expected. I held a colicky three month old in my arms and a two year old was on my husband's lap as I broke the news. I had recently left my career and knew that my husbands was in jeopardy and a third baby was the last thing on our mind. THANKFULLY, GOD'S TIME IS BETTER THAN OUR TIME!! On the night we found out that our sweet Jordyn was on the way, it was Christmas Eve 2008, we went to Christmas Eve service at Hope Point and they spoke about Mary. They spoke about Jesus not being a part of her plan BUT God's plan and her trust in God. At that moment, I gave my life to God and trusted him to navigate me through this VERY rocky time.
On September 3rd 2009, a beautiful baby girl named Jordyn Sophia Warren was born to us. The biggest, BEST surprise gift of my life. Not a single day goes by that I do not thank the Lord for blessing our family with her! I am having very, very hard week this week. I feel like although Caiden is my youngest, Jordyn turning 3 ends an era. I feel sad, lost and hurt. She has been such a blessing to me. She is SO much like me that it is scary. She is a true gift from God and EVERY TIME I look in her eyes, she captivates me. I feel like God himself, stepped down from heaven and gave her those sweet eyes, SO,if I have seemed off this week, forgive me. I am an OVER THE TOP MOM. 100% I live for my children and my husband. Life is life and it goes on, BUT watching this unexpected miracle grow has filled my life and heart like I never expected! Thank you Lord for giving me this sweet family, my amazing friends, my hectic, prefect job and this beautiful life. All the glory to you Lord! So, although I will post more soon, this is a post to my sweet
Jordyn Sophia Warren! Thank you for being you beautiful girl! OCD, aggressive, talkative, emotional, loving, silly, all of the things that your mama is! I love you so much angel face!! Thank you for choosing me to be your mama!
